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3 winters ago, I became obsessed with the idea of “Journey Home to Self”. Not this publication or the podcast but the actual Journey.
THE JOURNEY.
The one we are all on, whether we are aware of it or not. Maybe my obsession reached peak levels because I was ON the freakin’ journey myself and I so badly wanted to figure out how to get to the other side!
I’ve learned a thing or two about this sacred, messy, beautiful, eternal, and incredible Journey to come home to our true essence, our most authentic power and purpose.
First, let’s try to understand what the words “Journey Home”, “Return”, or even “Re-claiming” mean (I use them interchangeably throughout my work).
Re-claiming yourself is the deepest form of self-love. Not the kind that you find at a Spa but the kind you find when you stare at your naked body and in spite of the cellulite and the stretch marks and the dark circles and the pigmentation and the sagging boobs, you look at the person staring at you and whisper “I fucking love you.”
The kind that makes you rest when you are tired, say no when you want to say no, and the kind that knows that no amount of wealth, fame, or success can prove your worth, because, you were and always will be inherently worthy.
So, to return is to have resonance. With that deepest part of you that knows you, loves you fiercely, and thinks you are a freakin’ babe.
So we can say that Journey Home to Self is a feminine rebellion because it breaks the box that society puts us in. It is shedding the skin (the beliefs and narratives of the Patriarchal Culture) we’ve been carrying for years and years.
It isn’t an easy Journey. Anything worth having isn’t. But it is incredibly liberating.
This is how I see it, how I’ve experienced it, and how I now live it. I call it the Journey Home to Self Framework.
Before I share with you the framework, there are some “good to know” things about it:
There are 4 Stages or Levels on the Journey Home to Self
I call them Initiations and I see them based on the 4 Elements - Water, Air, Fire, and Earth
These stages (or Initiations) aren’t linear.
We all have to go through these stages to get closer to the Self. In other words, you can’t go over them, you can’t go under them. You can’t skip them and for the love of God, you can’t rush them (trust me, I’ve tried!)
Each Initiation comes with a Shadow and a Gift. The Shadow comes from our outer and inner world. The gift takes us closer to our true essence, raising our consciousness, and taking us closer to our authentic power and purpose.
You have complete Free Will on this Journey and a whole lot of guidance and resources at your disposal to carry you through each stage.
Now that we got the basics out of the way, let’s talk about those 4 Stages:
Over the next few weeks, I would love to share in detail about each of these stages. In the interest of not turning this piece into a thesis 😍 (I have 4 large notebooks filled with research on this plus countless Google docs !), I am sharing a brief overview of the stages below. Go through this and then tell me in the comments which stage you are at right now.
ZERO POINT
We all start at the Zero Point. Two things open the portal to our Journey; curiosity and/or Crisis. I wrote about it in a previous piece.
STAGE 1 - THE WATER INITIATION
I call it The Tomb. Other words to describe this Stage - The Void, The Big Unknown.
We have taken the first step to shed all our false beliefs in the desire to merge with our true essence so the Ego freaks out.
SHADOW - The biggest shadow here is the loud voice of the critic and it will do everything in its power to pull you back into the “known” world. One faces what I call the “Emotional Body” aka all the past trauma, emotions, and core beliefs such as “Iam not good enough” come right to the surface.
You’ll find yourself crying a lot at this stage. It isn’t called “Water” for nothing.
THE GIFT - Alchemy. The gift of this stage is to alchemize those emotions, lull the inner critic to sleep, and gather the courage to move further.
STAGE 2 - THE AIR INITIATION
Also known as The Forest.
You may no longer feel like you are buried under a Tomb but you aren’t out of the woods yet (literally!)
SHADOW - Self Doubt. “Am I making the right choices?” is the question you ask. We are very susceptible to outside voices here, especially authority figures who have always told us what to do. We may want to step outside the line here, but we may be fearful of getting cast out or burnt alive at the stake!
This Stage feels like a Misty Forest because you can’t see ahead. It’s scary but you have THE GIFT to help you
THE GIFT - Intuition. Your eternal Superpower. The lesson here is to strengthen the muscle of quieting all the self-doubt and outside voices and only listen to that still, small voice inside you.
If you suddenly feel like spending your time alone or in nature, you are in this Stage!
Before we go to Stage 3, we find ourselves at the Point of Pivot. This is where we ask the question “Should I stay or should I go?”. In other words “I can move further or be stuck in a circle of Fear and Self Doubt.”
Side Note - From time to time I find myself stuck here, circling Fear and Doubt. It takes a level of intention and courage to Pivot to the other side.
STAGE 3 - THE FIRE INITIATION
The Purge. This is what Joseph Campbell refers to as the “Dark Night of the Soul” in his Hero’s Journey. Say a prayer here: “Let everything that needs to go, go.”
This is that feeling when the roller coaster is coming down from 100 feet high and you have no control. Mysterious forces are at work. This is where Goddess Kali comes and swiftly burns down all that needs to be burnt.
SHADOW - Ego. Or rather Death of the Ego. All your beliefs, your reality, everything you believed to be true will be challenged here. This is the cleaning of the house to make room for the good and the new.
The Ego will throw a big tantrum here. Expect relationships to fall away. Careers, marriages, finances, and health may be shaken up loose. Yeah, it sounds dreary but in time you’ll learn that this was your biggest gift.
THE GIFT - UNBECOMING. The new YOU, the true YOU starts to evolve. Your I AM presence takes hold. You find the old, disempowering beliefs fall off and new, more empowering beliefs start taking root. Congratulations, you are changing your brain chemistry.
STAGE 4 - THE EARTH
Re-Birth. The Way Back Home.
SHADOW - Comparison or others projecting their fear and doubt on you.
THE GIFT - A feeling of Wholeness, Acceptance, Equanimity. Clarity on your Purpose.
You are deeply connected to your intuition. You see the Divine Plan in all your struggles. You feel a sense of Oneness with others and start seeing them as Whole too. Synchronicities happen all around you. You understand your Divine Purpose.
Journey Home to Self is a never-ending process of self-discovery. Every time we take this Journey, we come closer to the Source and God gets to know itself in many ways.
Do you see yourself on the Journey Home to Self? What stage(s) are you at right now?
xoxo
Deepshikha